the schmitz diary: Bittersweet Goodbye

On Monday, January 17, 2011, six days after his 86th birthday, my Grandpa Delbert Earl Blunk passed away at his home. It is never easy to loose a loved one, even when you know it's their time. The day after the funeral I posted the following to my Facebook page:

Just want to share this story about my Grandpa's services these past few days: What a show of support to see a never ending line of family and friends for several hours at the visitation. I always knew how wonderful and giving my grandpa had been, but I never really knew how much he had done for his community and the many friends he had. It was very touching to hear SO many stories about him helping so many people, many of the stories involved grandpa getting a vehicle unstuck. He never hesitated to lend a helping hand to a friend or even a stranger. Now I know where my own dad learned to be so selfless.

The Bettendorf Fire Department honored Grandpa for serving as a volunteer Fireman for 51 years by providing Honor Guards to stand by his casket for the entire visitation. The guards held a pipe pole and stood very still by Grandpa, looking forward barely blinking, switching out every 15 minutes. My 7 year old cousin Cara asked her mom if they could breathe, that’s how still they were.

Grandma, who has Alzheimer's disease, seemed to already know Grandpa was gone when the family came to the Manor Care to give her the news. The day after he passed, Grandma was saddened and cried for a long period, telling the staff that a man had died, without anyone telling her about Grandpa. After 64 years of marriage, even with her memory condition, she sensed her husband was gone.

The funeral home held all the services at St. Paul Lutheran Church, where Grandma and Grandpa were members and Jeremy and I were married just a few years ago. The church was filled with photos and souvenirs of Grandpa's life, including farming and family photos and a fireman's uniform. Everything was done beautifully, especially the slide show the funeral home put together with a final photo of Grandpa as a toddler waving goodbye. THAT definitely brought a tear or two.

My dad spent every day with Grandpa over the past year as his health declined, enabling him to live out his final days at his farm that had been home his entire life. This loss has been tough for Dad, but very bittersweet. Grandpa no longer has to feel any pain or feel bad that he could not drive himself around. Dad wrote a sweet message about Grandpa that he asked my sister Lisa to share at the funeral, in which she delivered in between tears. My aunt Barb also spoke and cousins Meredith and Hans sang for Grandpa.

When it came time to deliver Grandpa to his final rest, we started the journey from Davenport to Pleasant Valley Cemetery. Two fire trucks lead the funeral convoy, and to our surprise, we passed through two more blocking both directions of traffic along River Drive. What a site to see all the firemen standing at attention alongside the trucks, to honor Grandpa. And yet another fire truck had blocked traffic in Pleasant Valley with two more men at attention in the bitter cold, as we made our turn up to the cemetery.

Pastor Ron Huber gave a lovely burial service and we each said our last goodbyes. All the 13 grandchildren received a red rose in Grandpa’s honor. Apparently Grandpa’s plot had a tree planted on it at some point years ago that was too big to tear down, but they got him squeezed in next to it. I don’t think he will mind too much.

A big thank you goes to friends who have shown the family support, those who donated to the church and 4-H in Grandpa’s memory, and those who provided all the beautiful flowers and plants. He will not be forgotten!

This this the processional approaching the fire trucks blocking traffic. Until we got close, we thought there had been an accident. (These photos were taken by my cousin Laura)